Three weeks, three emails, all from coaches - good coaches - asking for my input as they struggle through a season of challenges, anxiety, and depression ...  among both their team and themselves.
 
First off, let me say, that asking me for advice about work-life balance is like asking the Minnesota Vikings how to win a Super Bowl.  In my first decade as a coach I was so misguided, I considered being single a competitive advantage. It meant more energy to put into my team.  More time to recruit.  More attention to the little things that add up to big things.
 
I was oblivious to the unsustainability of my path was until to I couldn't ignore it any longer. Amazingly, two people stepped in to steer me in the right direction. The first was the father of one of our swimmers who understood the pressures of the job - Purdue's Dan Ross. Dan pointed me in the right direction by sharing some of the challenges he had faced and offered me a new vision of how to define and pursue success. Now if you know Dan, you know his advice was subtle. Likewise, if you've ever faced a personal melt-down you know that subtlety oftentimes isn't enough. That's where my University President grabbed the wheel and said, "You're not allowed to fail."  Instead, he explained, I needed to "get away for a while and get your s%&t together."  And with that, he sent me on a sabbatical.
 
Few of us ever get the opportunity for a sabbatical, and frankly, I'm not sure I was (or am) reflective enough to benefit from one.  One thing I did though, was to start running, like a lot. After a couple of months, I signed up for my first-ever race - a 50K trail marathon.
 
What I learned (aside from the fact that I probably should have signed up for a 5 or 10K first) is that to have a successful career, you have to play the long game, just like a marathon training.  To me, that meant:

1. Few successes or failures are neither immediate nor permanent.  Landing a big recruit or having a great workout are just a part of the process, same as a strained hamstring or a freshman getting written up.  The bigger thing is to stay healthy and focus on the big things instead of dwelling on the little things.

2. Challenges are a part of the deal. For me, November and January were the equivalents of long runs. Sunlight is scarce, training is hard, rewards are few and the personal sacrifice is real.  Still, they're a necessary and transformational part of the process.  You can't expect to run a marathon if you haven't done your long runs and you can't expect success if you haven't done the work.

3. Things do get better.  The days get longer (as a runner) as the yards get shorter (as a coach). The approach of the finish line - both literal and metaphorical - is what excites us and keeps calling us back.   

4. A Change of Pace Is Necessary - After completing the 58K (I got lost) I was already thinking about the next one, but no way was I hitting the trail anytime soon.  Even the most balanced coaches find their lives consumed in February and March. As much as the NCAA has turned recruiting into a year-round endeavor, however, Spring offers the opportunity to mix up your routine.  Maybe that means working with a smaller group for NCAA's.  Maybe it is delegating new responsibilities to your assistants.  Maybe it means taking up something new...like running.  Just understand that mixing up your routine is as necessary as your success as periodizing your kids' training. 

Best wishes as you move towards the finish line.  I'm cheering for every one of you (and the Vikings),

GE

PS -  The NCAA has produced a solid workbook A Matter of Balance that highlights some of their research into the area along with practical exercises.